I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - U2

Friends, I've been quite remiss at adding new material to my JAM Session blog. I took vacation in February and then life got a bit busy. Then after that I just was out of the habit.

During Lent, I practiced the Daniel Fast. It's not really a fast. It's more of a strict diet meant for spiritual purposes. It definitely has healthy benefits. It's basically a vegan diet with a few other limitations like whole grains only and no yeast. I was supposed to drink water only, but I allowed myself herbal teas, but kept to the no caffeine restriction.

I practice some kind of Lenten observance for the sake of setting myself aside for God in a more intense and focused way than other times of the year. I find it rewarding. Easter was wonderfully uplifting, for I reminded myself often when I had cravings for foods I was denying myself, that I needed God more than I needed foods like hamburgers, coffee, or sugary sweet desserts. I experienced some sort of reward because I felt wonderfully joyful on Easter Sunday. You could say I found what I was looking for.

Bono, from the Irish band U2, penned "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" for the Joshua Tree album released in 1987. The track eventually reached number one on the charts and was included in The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum's list of "500 Songs That Shaped Rock 'N' Roll."

The song has an interesting development in that it originally was chosen from jam session demos because of a unique drum beat laid down by Larry Mullen, Jr. The guitarist Edge found the song to be a bit too simplistic. Bono was interested in the theme of spiritual searching. Edge finally found the right words for the hook. Written on a piece of paper, Edge handed Bono, while he was in the midst of singing during recordings, the words, "I still haven't found what I'm looking for." That phrase lead to the rest of the song. I just seemed to fit.

Here's a video from the lads from Dublin.  http://youtu.be/EabB55IYyOg

Look at the lyrics.


I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For - U2


I have climbed the highest mountains
I have run through the fields
Only to be with you
Only to be with you

I have run I have crawled
I have scaled these city walls
These city walls
Only to be with you
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for

I have kissed honey lips
Felt the healing in the fingertips
It burned like fire
This burning desire
I have spoke with the tongue of angels
I have held the hand of a devil
It was one empty night
I was cold as a stone
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for

I believe when the Kingdom comes
Then all the colors will bleed into one
Bleed into one
But yes I'm still running.
You broke the bonds
You loosened the chains
You carried the cross
Of my shame
Of my shame
You know I believed it
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for

But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for
But I still haven't found
What I'm looking for
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bono doesn't consider himself a very good Christian, but he feels a responsibility to use the stage he's been given to do good. Bono has sort of a love/hate relationship with the church. He loves the faith. He loves Jesus and tries to follow Him. He doesn't appreciate the lip service of the church. The church has grown ineffective in its mission to reach the world for Christ. (At least that is how I read him.)

The song expresses the search for God. He's tried all kinds of things for the purpose of being with God. It sounds like a  love relationship, but one that never seems to bring the singer to complete satisfaction.

The bible makes some good promises to seekers and searchers. When God sent Israel into exile for the nation's unfaithfulness, God sent prophets to encourage them. He would bring them back home, when their hearts turned back to God.

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. (Jer 29:13)

The writer of Hebrews says the search for God requires faith. He defines faith as "confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see." (Heb 11:1)

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. (Heb 11:6)

We must believe God exists in order to search for God and have the conviction that our search will be rewarded. Faith is more a journey, a lifestyle, than it is a destination. Faith is a relationship with God which is ever unfolding and ever deepening. To say one has not found what they're looking for is reasonably expected for all people of faith. God is leading us ever deeper into Himself, a journey that takes a lifetime. 

While we may not reach some state of perfect knowledge or perfect peace, we will reach a place of assurance that our life of faith is a reward in itself. Seekers will relish in the search of more treasure since on the way they finds bits and pieces of gold and jewelry pointing to the great store. Jesus once spoke of the kingdom of heaven being like treasure.

The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. (Mat 13:44)

Christians, like Bono, have discovered enough of God in Jesus Christ, to be able to know that they do not need to look any further than Jesus. Their search for God continues through their ever growing relationship with the Lord. It is a search that will be rewarded again and again, always leaving us with a desire to journey further. We want more of what God gives.

And so let the words of Jesus to the early disciples be a word to you who seek.

"Come and see."  (Jn 1:39)

Lord Jesus, help us to see that you are all we are searching for. Keep us ever true in our reach for You. Satisfy our hearts, but never let us decide we have discovered all there is to know about You. Keep us always learning and growing in Your love and grace. Amen.

The Sea Refuses No River by Pete Towshend

Of all the rick musicians this world has been blessed or cursed with, Pete Townshend is on the top of my list. I so connect to his music. I don't know what it is that drew me to him first. Likely it was The Who album Who's Next. When it came out my brother played it all the time. I know many of the songs by heart as a young boy. When I started collecting my own horde of music, Who's Next was one of the albums I had to have recorded on cassette. I remember when I got my first car stereo, it was Who Next that I popped into the cassette player.

Oddly enough, I'm not talking about any Who songs today. I'm focusing on Townhend's solo career. Townhend released a solo project in 1972 called Who Came First. It was meant to be a tribute album for his religion as a devotee of Meher Baba. So, at least in Pete's mind, the album was not a solo career launch. He was very much into the creative possibilities of The Who and the Liftehouse project, which was expressed Who's Next, Who Are You and a bit of a few other albums. In 1977 he released a solo project with his friend Ronnie Lane called Rough Mix. Again the album was more about helping a friend than it was a serious attempt to launch a solo career. Lane had basically been kicked out of his band The Faces by Rod Stewart, or that's one of the rumors.

In 1980, after the 1978 death of Who drummer Keith Moon, Pete Townshend pursued a solo career in earnest. He released Empty Glass in 1980 and in 1982 he released All The Best Cowboys Have Chinese Eyes. Whereas Empty Glass went to number 5 on the album charts, Chinese Eyes went only to 26. Empty glass has several radio hits. Chinese Eyes singles did not make top forty, but managed to chart int he album oriented rock stations in the top 100.

The song I am drawn to the most on Chinese Eyes is The Sea Refuses No River, a composition inspired by faith and poetry. Alan Rogan co-wrote the song with Pete. Rogan was The Who's guitar technician. He's been with the who for over 30 years.

Give it a listen and read the lyrics below.  http://youtu.be/RQ3LzvMqfHw

The Sea Refuses No River
Songwriters: Pete Townshend and Alan Rogan

I remember being richer than a king
The minutes of the day were golden
I recall that when the joint passed round
My body felt a little colder
But now I'm like a sewer channel - running lime and scag
Let me get at the master panel - let me at my stack

The sea refuses no river

And right now this river's banks are blown
The sea refuses no river
Whether stinking and rank
Or red from the tank
Whether pure as a spring
There's no damned thing stops the poem
The sea refuses no river
And this river is homeward flowing

I have seen a trace of strain
In other's eyes not spoken
I must admit that I enjoyed their pain
But this time it's me that's broken
I demand for you and His
This must be the time
When we decide what freedom is
Turn water into wine

For the sea refuses no river
We're polluted now but in our hearts still clean
The sea refuses no river
We tried not to age
But time had it's rage
We're washed over stones
From babes into clones of the mean
The sea won't refuse this muddy river
Nor deny the sulfurous stream

There was a fool in a dressing robe
Riding out the twilight hour
Lonely and cold in an empty home
Trying to assess his power
But now he's like a stream in flood
Swollen by the storm
He doesn't care if he sheds his blood
Let him be reborn

For the sea refuses no river
Remember that when the beggar buys a round
The sea refuses no river
And rain fills the gutters
No time for stutters
This is our chance
To sing and to dance and to clown
The sea refuses no river
And rivers were sprung to drown

The sea refuses no river
No pecking code respected for the damned
The sea refuses no river
Whether starving or ill
Or strung on some pill
Just 'cos you own the land
There's no unique hand plugs the dam
The sea refuses no river
And the river is where I am

The river is where I am.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Putting Pete Townshend in his historical setting helps me get after what is going on in this song. When Keith Moon died in 1978, The Who tried to continue on, but it became apparent to Townshend that it was over. The magic was gone. Whatever chemistry there was between the four musicians that made the Who what they were had vanished with Keith's death. Moon was a bit of a muse for Pete. He drive Pete crazy and he loved Keith like a brother. They drove one another on stage and sometimes off stage.

Pete's solo projects in 1980 and 1982 were released the same time he was working on Who albums. Chinese Eyes was released the same year as The Who's It's Hard and was promoted by The Who's Farewell Tour that same year. Townshend was very busy and at the same time very conflicted. He wanted out of the band. He wanted to move on into something other than being a part of The Who. Popularity and fame made it nearly impossible. In addition, Pete truly cared about the remaining members and knew that they needed him. they needed The Who to remain an entity. That kind of confusion, torn between the desire to reinvent yourself and the entanglements of commitments to others is present throughout the album and especially in the song The Sea Refuses No River.

The first verse speaks of how stardom and wealth lead to drug excesses and a cold empty soul. He feels like a filthy sewer inside. He feels toxic like industrial waste being dumped into the river. And this feeling of toxicity inside drives him to run to music to get away from himself. He loses himself in the guitar power of the Marshall stack and the creativity of the studio. 

Towshend was once asked in an interview by Time-Life why he felt the guitar has being the instrument synonymous with rock'n'roll. Townshend replied, "To understand one simply has to plug a Gibson guitar into a Marshall stack and hit an A chord. Then they'll know why." Won't Get Fooled Again, anyone?

The refrain of the song is the title. It is the hopeful image that the immense ocean will accept any stream, no matter how filthy and eventually cleanse that filthy away. This of course is a metaphor for hope in God's love and mercy. It is a hope that no matter what a mess we have made of our lives, God will not refuse us when we come to Him.

The singer knows he's a stinking mess, but he's flowing homeward to God where he knows there will be acceptance and healing love. There he will be able to rebuild and renew.

I demand for you and His

This must be the time

When we decide what freedom is

Turn water into wine.

Even though Pete is not a Christian, I've seen him wearing crosses. He cannot deny his Christian upbringing. His allusion to God includes an allusion to Christ. While Pete believes Meher Baba was God on earth, the Christian believes that Jesus is the incarnation of God. Through faith in Him God lives in us. We are changed through our faith in Christ like water is miraculously changed into wine.

Townshend sings of the human condition. We are all not living to our potential. We are all polluted by poor choices. And we know that there is an purer innocence within us, what we once were, and what we could be again. God created us in His image. (Gen 1:27) We know we are not living as God desires. We know that there is a higher calling we must attain.

When Townshend reflects on his own journey, he was just a child when he began rocking with The Detours, later to become The Who. He cynically remarks that they were once wide eyed babes, but now they are just "clones of the mean." It take this to mean that The Who is no longer the creative and explosive band it once was. They have simply become mainstream, no longer controversial or compelling. This is death to creative types who long to express the new thing, something above the mundane middle of the road. Rebirth is required.

Townshend in the song reveals his desire to leave The Who behind and reinvent himself. "No time for stutters" is a direct reference to The Who. My Generation, one of The Who's biggest hits, includes vocalist Roger Daltrey stuttering. It's Townshend's way of saying, "I'm done with all that."

Townshend feels trapped by The Who and the recording industry that wants him to stay put. He rails against them by appealing to a higher authority. There's no pecking code respected in God like there is for the damned music industry. So as Pete flows homeward bound, he knows and trusts that God will renew him and he will find a way to reinvent himself in the midst of the confusion and frustrations he is feeling.

I will assure you can relate. I certainly have struggled with life's direction and where I fit in it. For years I lived frustrated believing I had some grander purpose than what I had achieved. It has become my understanding that my fear of being ordinary is part and parcel of humanity's fall. My insecurities were the direct result of my separation from God through my own stinking sewer like soul. Once I realized that my greatest worth is union with my creator, I made that my ambition. 

You may feel your life is pointless or meaningless. You haven't done anything extraordinary. The fact is you are already extraordinary. there is no one exactly like you. There is no one with your DNA code. You are a unique occurrence in history. There's not another person like you and there never will be. Even if you were cloned, that clone would end up with different experiences than you and become a different person altogether. So be who you are. Your greatest work is to become you. You will find that in the bounteous love of God there is freedom to become who you were always meant to be. So flow homeward.

I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. (Php 3:14)

The apostle Paul wrote about sharing in the glorious resurrection of Christ, to become a new creation. Jesus spoke of being born again by the Spirit. (Jn 3:5-8) The homeward route to rebirth is to flow toward God who loves you and sent His Son to save your from your sulfurous streams. In Him there is cleansing and healing and hope.

Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. (1Co 6:9-11)

When you realize the course of your life is leading nowhere good, come to the Sea, the eternal love of God and be washed clean in the blood of Jesus Christ. Rebirth is always possible. Flow homeward.

Dear Lord, thank you for cleansing me and continuing to perfect me. I pray for all who continue to live in corruption and without You. Help your church to find a way to welcome them into your wide mercy that they too might be reborn in the love of God through Jesus Christ. Amen 

Mr. Tambourine Man by The Byrds

Bob Dylan is a force to be reckoned with. His fierce stare and his brooding brow in the photographs of him in the early and middle 1960's communicated the disenchantment the younger generation had with the world they were inheriting. He was a poet. He was a prophet. He spoke words that felt like truth to the younger generation and even to those among the older establishment. His music inspired John Lennon to write lyrics with social commentary, instead of pop songs gushing about girls. Many other artists moved to writing music with meaning. Dylan was ground zero. As Bruce Springsteen once said, "Elvis taught us to move our bodies and Dylan taught us to use our minds." The moving groove of rock music married with thoughtful lyrics became a powerful weapon in the arsenal of the social revolution of the 1960's.

I'm certain my commentary is not new, nor is it universally accepted. Be that as it may Bob Dylan's songs have been covered by many artists. I have already written about Jimi Hendrix's cover of Dylan's All Along The Watchtower. Today my thoughts turn to the west coast band The Byrds who covered Dylan's Mr. Tambourine Man.

According to Wikipedia

The song has a bright, expansive melody and has become famous in particular for its surrealistic imagery, influenced by artists as diverse as French poet Arthur Rimbaud and Italian filmmaker Federico Fellini. The lyrics call on the title character to play a song and the narrator will follow. Interpretations of the lyrics have included a paean to drugs such as LSD, a call to the singer's muse, a reflection of the audience's demands on the singer, and religious interpretations. Dylan sings the song in four verses, of which The Byrds used only the second for their recording. Dylan's and The Byrds' versions have appeared on various lists ranking the greatest songs of all time, including an appearance by both on Rolling Stone's list of the 500 best songs ever. Both versions also received Grammy Hall of Fame Awards.

The Byrd's version of Mr. Tambourine Man went to number one on the Billboard charts in 1965. The Los Angeles band is considered to be influential in beginning the sub-genre within rock music known as folk rock. 

Give it a listen.  http://youtu.be/06rGW0AQGiY

"Mr. Tambourine Man"

by Robert Zimmerman (a.k.a. Bob Dylan)


Hey Mister Tambourine Man, play a song for me
I'm not sleepy and there ain't no place I'm goin' to
Hey Mister Tambourine Man, play a song for me
In the jingle jangle morning, I'll come followin' you

Take me for a trip upon your magic swirlin' ship
All my senses have been stripped
And my hands can't feel to grip
And my toes too numb to step
Wait only for my boot heels to be wanderin'

I'm ready to go anywhere I'm ready for to fade
On to my own parade 

cast your dancin' spell my way
I promise to go under it

Hey Mister Tambourine Man, play a song for me
I'm not sleepy and there ain't no place I'm goin' to
Hey Mister Tambourine Man, play a song for me
In the jingle jangle morning, I'll come followin' you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you listen to the ethereal sound of The Byrds interpretation, and knowing what the 1960's were like, it's easy to see why some think this song is about drugs, like the hallucinogen LSD or marijuana. Bob Dylan has denied the song is about drugs, but rather about a large tambourine which one of his session players brought to a recording session. That was this inspiration that got the song started. Dylan wrote while touring cross country. He visited New Orleans during Mardi Gras. Some have suggested the hypnotic influence of music in New Orleans may have contributed to the song's imagery. 

What is certain is The Byrds fixated on only one verse of Dylan's four verses for their recording. Compare the lyrics to Dylan's original version to what The Byrds released. I've removed the chorus repetitions.

Chorus:

Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me
I’m not sleepy and there is no place I’m going to
Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me
In the jingle jangle morning I’ll come followin’ you

Though I know that evenin’s empire has returned into sand
Vanished from my hand
Left me blindly here to stand but still not sleeping
My weariness amazes me, I’m branded on my feet
I have no one to meet
And the ancient empty street’s too dead for dreaming

chorus

Take me on a trip upon your magic swirlin’ ship
My senses have been stripped, my hands can’t feel to grip
My toes too numb to step
Wait only for my boot heels to be wanderin’
I’m ready to go anywhere, I’m ready for to fade
Into my own parade, cast your dancing spell my way
I promise to go under it

chorus

Though you might hear laughin’, spinnin’, swingin’ madly across the sun
It’s not aimed at anyone, it’s just escapin’ on the run
And but for the sky there are no fences facin’
And if you hear vague traces of skippin’ reels of rhyme
To your tambourine in time, it’s just a ragged clown behind
I wouldn’t pay it any mind
It’s just a shadow you’re seein’ that he’s chasing

chorus

Then take me disappearin’ through the smoke rings of my mind
Down the foggy ruins of time, far past the frozen leaves
The haunted, frightened trees, out to the windy beach
Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow
Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free
Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands
With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves
Let me forget about today until tomorrow

chorus 

Copyright © 1964, 1965 by Warner Bros. Inc.; renewed 1992, 1993 by Special Rider Music

My interpretation veers away from drugs. Knowing that Dylan writes imagery here and not so much a coherent ballad narrative to follow, I think the song is simply what it seems. It's about the power of music to transport us from our tiredness and our worries for a time to go to a place of dreams and imagination. Perhaps Dylan pictures himself the restless man whose travels have wearied him, but he's not sleeping. Perhaps that night at Mardi Gras led to an all night venture into hanging out at music hot spots. As the night ebbed away and the dawn approached a new day, the tired and sleepless Dylan only wants to continue the dance with music. Perhaps The rhythm of the tambourine jingling as he plays his guitars is enough to keep him in that happy place where the troubles of the world are kept at bay.

The overall feeling of the words is that the singer wants to be taken away by the music. The trip isn't one led on foot as much as it is an internal journey. The wandering boot heels of the singer communication following the music where it takes him. 

I'm sure we all can identify with the desire to be taken away from the cares of the world. Karl Marx is quoted to have said, "Religion is the opiate of the masses." It has become a bit of a sound byte for critics of religion. The full quote from Karl Marx is: "Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people".

If Marx is right, then religion is a means to avoid the troubles of a heartless world. Marx worked to improve life in his world through political socialism. Jesus Christ is transforming the world through holy community.

I know that some adherents to Christianity are so other worldly they are of no earthly good. They want to leave this world of trouble, not work to transform it. They want to hide in safety until the storm passes, rather than rise in the authority of the creator and calm the storm. But most of the Christians I know are not like that at all. Instead they are the first in line to run to the side of those who are devastated by hurricane, flood, tornado, fire and earthquake. 

The Untied Methodist Committee on Relief (UMCOR) is often the first organization on site, ready to help displaced families and individuals, setting up refuge and emergency services in tandem with the Red Cross. Often UMCOR is still on site helping people recover years after the government resources have moved on. Far from using religion as escapism, these loving and courageous people run headlong into the jaws of devastation and poverty. 

They are under the spell of a different drummer than the tambourine man, or any musician for that matter. Their hearts dance to the love of God. They follow not the trance induced rhythm of music. They follow the author of life and the savior of all souls. 

Like the singer, they have a similar happy surrendering to the One they follow. They too are "ready to go anywhere." as the follow Jesus, they are led to places and experiences they would not likely choose for themselves. And they are ready to fade into their own individual journey led by the Lord Jesus.

After feeding five thousand or so hungry people with bread from heaven and after giving a blind man sight by His healing power, Jesus took His disciples aside and instructed them about he kingdom of God. He told them that He must die, but on the third day rise from the grave. Peter was especially unwilling to hear Jesus' words. Jesus had to rebuke Peter. 

“You do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns.” (Mk 8:33b)

Then Jesus turned to all His followers there and told them that they too must carry a cross. If we are going to help save the world, we are going to have to sacrifice ourselves to the cause.

“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul?" (Mk 8:34b-37)

Jesus clearly is not call for escapism from the troubles of life, but rather He offers power for living well and victoriously in the face of all mortal life throws in our path. Because we have this grace, His powerful love propelling us, we are not only living in victory for ourselves, we are bringing Christ and His victory to others. It begins by helping fulfill basic needs. While we serve, we do so with the love of Jesus. We share the same compassion he exerted when he laid hands upon the blind or broke bread with the outcast.

We follow in submission to the mission of Christ to transform the world through loving and holy communities dedicated to sharing hope, bringing health and welcoming holiness. As we share in the good nature of Christ, we are under His spell, to use Dylan's lyric, and we promise to follow where He leads. He leads us to the hurting and helpless. He leads us to the ivory towers of government and industry to advocate for those who have no voice. He leads us to greet strangers with respect and care. He leads us to work toward a world where there is trouble no more for anyone. His grace will accomplish it.

Lord, free your church from hiding behind religion. Make us courageous and a vital transformative presence in Your world. Help us to follow You wherever You lead. Amen

Last Child by Aerosmith

One of my favorite Aerosmith songs is Last Child from their 1976 Rocks album. The song has an infectious groove that just never ceases to get me moving. Love it!  Aside from the rocking and danceable tune, the lyrics are a bit more difficult to decipher. I never took the time to really listen to the lyrics of this song. I knew bits and pieces like "I was a last child. Just a punk in the street." Being from the punk generation, that was my main connection to this song,

Give it a listen.  http://youtu.be/d1AaCy-yU9c

Last Child

Songwriters: Steven Tyler, Brad Whitford

I'm dreaming tonight, I'm living back home
Right!
Yeah...yeah

Take me back to a south Tallahassee
Down cross the bridge to my sweet sassafrassy
Can't stand up on my feet in the city
Gotta get back to the real nitty gritty

Yes sir, no sir
Don't come close to my
Home sweet home
Can't catch no dose
Of my hot tail poon tang sweetheart
Sweathog ready to make a silk purse
From a J Paul Getty and his ear
With her face in her beer

Home sweet home

Get out in the field
Put the mule in the stable
Ma she's a cookin'
Put the eats on the table
Hate's in the city
And my love's in the meadow
Hands on the plow
And my feets in the ghetto

Stand up, sit down
Don't do nothing
It ain't no good when boss man's
Stuffin' down their throats
For paper notes
And their babies cry
While cities lie at their feet
When you're rockin' the street

Home sweet home

Mama, take me home sweet home

I was the last child
I'm just a punk in the street
[Repeat]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the simplest interpretation this song is about a desire to get back home. Steven Tyler sings with words that do not easily connect in coherent thoughts. It's more brief snapshots of images and ideas thrown in a general direction. There's a dichotomy between the life he once knew in the country out in the meadow working the fields and loving his sweetheart under the gulf coast Florida sun.

The song cannot be autobiographical in the literal sense. Tyler was from New York and Whitford from the Boston area. By means of a fictional character who was raised in the country around Tallahassee. Florida, the bandmates share their longing for home and a simpler life before the craziness of non-stop touring. 

What does the character desire from home? His sex partner is one, but he's too busy working in the city to be with her. He wants his momma's cooking too, but he's having to work for the man who shoves paper dollar bills down his throat. 

The reference to J Paul Getty is about the wealth that some pursue. Perhaps the billionaire oil tycoon represents all of city life and the pursuit of wealth. The feeling I get is that the country boy from Florida finds the whole enterprise to be cheap. All the glitter and glitz of the city is nothing compared to his home sweet home and the life he once knew in country.

"Sweathog ready to make a silk purse" is the songwriter's variation on the old proverb "You can't make a silk purse from a sow's ear."  In other words you cannot make something exquisite or valuable from cheap ingredients.  The country boy sees his slaving away in the city as cheap like a sow's ear.  In this case the sow is Jean Paul Getty, one of the richest men in the world at the time. 

In 1976 J. Paul Getty released his autobiography. Getty was worth over $8 billion in today's currency. He knew six languages. His oil business was enhanced greatly by his ability to speak Arabic. He died of heart failure before it was released. Getty also wrote the book, "How to Get Rich." While I don't remember Getty from the 1970's, he was news. 

Getty was known as an infamous miser. The reference to J. Paul Getty and his ear is not simply about the cheapness of money grubbing. J. Paul Getty's grandson, J. Paul Getty III, was kidnapped. When Getty refused to pay the ransom for his son, the kidnappers cut off his son's ear and sent it to Getty as a show of their resolve. They would kill him if Getty did not pay the ransom. In response Getty paid the ransom and then required his grandson repay him the debt!

Our culture celebrates celebrity and wealth. We make rock stars out of wealthy people. Even in small towns the rich are both hated and celebrated. The sow's ear depiction of wealthy men like Getty says something about how the boys in Aerosmith may have been feeling at the time.

They were experiencing success. The 1975 album Toys in the Attic broke Aerosmith into mainstream status and Rocks in 1976 cemented their status as hard rockin' superstars. My guess is that the confusion created by their sudden success was overwhelming and they longed for the younger days when things were simpler and less hectic.

The Bible warns about chasing after wealth. Although the band started out with the desire to play music, the love for music as a career demands touring and touring. It demands growing and building an audience. It means, as Brad Whitford would say, "climbing in a station wagon and going for it." But with the demands of touring and record company expectations to produce income, these bad boys from Boston had not yet learned how to deal with success and wealth.

Tyler developed a significant cocaine addiction and basically blew his wealth on drugs. By the 1980's Aerosmith almost imploded. Through their ability to return to their first love, music and performance, fans have been given four decades of great music.

The apostle Paul wrote to his protege Timothy about counseling the rich in his congregation.

For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. (1Ti 6:7-10)

After sharing this warning with Timothy, Paul tells him to purse what is really valuable, that is righteousness or godliness.

But you, man of God, flee from all this, and pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, endurance and gentleness. Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses. (1Ti 6:11-12)

Such a man knows true riches lie in eternal realms found within our spirits through our relationship with God. He will be able to lead others to that wellspring of living water within everyone. The wealthy are in danger of missing true wealth because they are self-reliant.

Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life. (1Ti 6:17-19)

I've never had the opportunity to fellowship with the insanely wealthy like Getty or Donald Trump, but I've befriended quite a few comfortably well off folks within the church. They are generous, love life and are willing to help when the call comes. They know where true riches are and they understand their earthly wealth is a gift entrusted to them from God. They live gratefully and put their wealth to good use. They don't take vows of poverty. They live with luxuries, but they give to charities and ministries that benefit others.

Then there are those who are all about money and constantly focus on getting more. The money becomes an end to itself. They haven't learned to honor God, nor do they share open-handedly with their neighbors.

When Howard Hughes died, he was one of the richest men in history. He lived in seclusion terrified of germs. His fingernails had grown out at an unusual length and his hair was long and unkempt. He was not prepared for the life to come. He was terrified of losing his life to the point he avoided all dangers. Such is the sad end for those who are so tied to this life that they are not free to embrace the next.

J. Paul Getty used to quip, "The meek may inherit the earth, but not the mineral rights." While he was laughing all the way to the bank, the meek continue to love and honor God and lay up for themselves a life of true riches and a home with God. Jesus taught in his sermon on the mount that the meek shall inherit the earth. (Mat 5:5)  He also had a parable tailor made for men like Getty.

And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest. He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’
“Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain. And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’

“But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’

“This is how it will be with whoever stores up things for themselves but is not rich toward God.” (Lk 12:16-21)

Dear God, save us from the trappings of the love of money. Teach our hearts to long for our home sweet home with You. Make us faithful stewards of the earthly wealth You entrust to us. Help us to love our neighbors and do good to them that they might know Your love and faithfulness as do we. Amen

Some People by The Fixx

It's another one of those mornings when I woke up with an obscure track working it's way out of the subconscious archives filed away in my audio experiences. When I was in college there were three bands form the new wave explosion on the radio I really connected with: U2, INXS, and The Fixx. I liked plenty of other tunes. The Who had Eminence Front out and Athena at the same time as U2's New Year's Day and Sunday Bloody Sunday. INXS was out with Don't Change and the Fixx had Red Skies and Stand Or Fall on the radio.

I can remember shooting pool in the basement of our rental in my college days. 1982-83 was my junior year in engineering school and these songs were part of my soundtrack. I can't say why I gravitated to the Fixx. I really like the singer's voice and the guitar work under the synthesizer driven tunes is interesting. I'm even less sure as to why Some People can into my conscious view this morning. It's not even a hit of theirs. I never bought the album. These were the poor college student days. I recorded a copy on cassette from my cousin's album. I could not find the album for MP3 download on the usual sites. Appearing as track number two on their debut album Shuttered Room (1982). The hits on the US version of the album were Red Skies and Stand or Fall.

Give it a listen.  http://youtu.be/2T15_ZVPdFs

Some People

Songwriters: Barrett, Charles H / Curnin, Cyril / Greenall, Peter / West-oram, James / Woods, Adam Terence.

Some people make it
Some people try
Some people break it
Some people cry
Some people lose it
Some people find
Some people lead us
And some are behind

It's a slow slow break up
That's what we find
It's a so so make up
Make up your mind

It's a slow slow break up
That's what we find
It's a so so make up
Make up your mind

What is the point of being amused
I see the people standing abused
They keep their faces buried in hands
They keep their plates clean
But underneath...

Some people drink gin
Some people dry
Some people drive cars
And some people fly
Some people take trains
Some people walk
Some people hold it
And some people talk

It's a slow slow break up
That's what we find
It's a so so make up
Make up your mind

What is the point of being amused
I see the people standing abused
They keep their faces buried in hands
They keep their plates clean
But underneath...

They like to fly with the jetsetters
They want to be with the go-getters
And then the moment comes around
Once again we'll find
He's taking pills and drink just
To find his peace of mind

Some people do it
Some people won't
Some people do da
Some people don't
Some people Liepzig
Some people Prague
Some people lucid
And some people vague

It's a no go faker
That's what we find
It's a no no taker
What's on your mind

It's a no go faker
That's what we find
It's a no no taker
What's on your mind

What is the point of being amused
I see the people standing abused
They keep their faces buried in hands
They keep their plates clean
But underneath...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The overall message I get from this song is the ferment of social revolution bubbling underneath polite society. To draw upon the the often quoted Henry David Thoreau, the song is pointing to the human condition. According to Walden.org this following popular quote is a misquotation of Thoreau

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.”

The first half of this quotation is a misquotation from Thoreau's Walden:

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation. From the desperate city you go into the desperate country, and have to console yourself with the bravery of minks and muskrats. A stereotyped but unconscious despair is concealed even under what are called the games and amusements of mankind. There is no play in them, for this comes after work. But it is a characteristic of wisdom not to do desperate things.”

The second half of this quotation is misattributed to Thoreau and may be a misquotation or misremembering of Oliver Wendell Holmes' (1809-1894) "The Voiceless":

Alas for those that never sing,
But die with all their music in them.

The feeling I get as I look at the lyrics is that people have all kinds of way of coping with life. People have a variety of ways to busy themselves as they avoid the deep nag of wanting more. We want more meaning, more stuff, more happiness, more security, more freedom, more fun, more excitement, more, more, more.

Since most of us either do not know how to get more, or don't believe we can get more. we settle for less and live lives of quiet desperation. We live with the tension of wanting to be more, knowing there is a great potential in us. The recent film, The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, features a character who spends most of his time fantasizing about life, instead of actually living it. Cloistered by his own insecurities he watches from the wings as others perform under the spotlights. His heart longs to be one of the heroes, but he's too afraid.  Or is he? There is that moment when we cast fear aside and take the plunge. Sometimes our worst fears are realized and we fail miserably. Sometimes we have the time of our lives. Sometimes we actually make a difference.

Today, I mourn the sad death of actor Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Here was a great talent who created memorable characters on the big screen and on the stage. But, like so many artists, he had an addiction. He died with a needle in his arm at only 47 years old. So very sad.

Hoffman's death should be a warning to all of us. Numbing the pain of our inner condition is not the answer. That desire in us to be more or to have more is what makes us human. We are created in God's image. The first three chapters of Genesis explain why we are the way we are.

So God created humankind in his image,
in the image of God he created them;
male and female he created them. (Gen 1:27)

There's something divine, that is higher, in us. The reason we want more, need more and reach for more is because we were made for more. We were made to reach higher, all the way to heaven to be with like our maker.

The garden story illustrates this point. Adam, the man made from dust, was formed by God's hands. He was animated by God breathing into him the breath of life. (Gen 2:7) God's own Spirit resides in the human being. God placed Adam in the Garden of Eden to keep it and work it. (Gen 2:15) He took a rib from Adam's side and gave him Eve, the woman, as a companion. (Gen 2:21-22)Adam was told he could eat of any fruit of the trees in the garden, save one. He was not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. (Gen 2:16-17)

The second chapter of Genesis describes the relationship humanity was intended to have with God. We were to enjoy a paradise-like relationship in which we walked unashamed before our creator and one another. (Gen 2:25)

But we lost this paradise. We lost it because the very quality that causes us to reach higher causes us to reach in the wrong direction. The serpent seduced the woman to eat the forbidden fruit. He made it look like an answer to our inner desire to be more or have more.

But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not die; for God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” (Gen 3:4-5)

Eve and Adam were convinced to do what they were told was not the thing to do. The took the forbidden fruit and ate it, thinking they would become like God. Their eyes were opened and they knew good and evil. The experienced the taste of evil by heeding the voice of the serpent and experiencing for themselves that which is forbidden. And they were ashamed.

God cast them from His presence in paradise. They left the protected and plentiful garden to work the accursed ground of a fallen and corrupted world. We are separated from God because of sin. And we lead lives of quiet desperation because we have not found the way back into that relationship for which we were made.

We keep our faces buried in our hands. We keep our plates clean, meaning we behave according to the laws of society, for the most part. But underneath we know there has to be something more. Underneath there is that tension, that fermenting urge to be more and to have more. We want to be with the jetsetters and go-getters, because we think that is the answer. The Fixx acknowledges that the jetsetting, go-getting life is not the ultimate answer.

And then the moment comes around
Once again we'll find
He's taking pills and drink just
To find his peace of mind

Phillip Seymour Hoffman died of an overdoes of heroin trying to find an escape, trying to find peace in an opiate infused release from the pain of mortality. But he is just one tragic example of what most of us are doing. We are all reaching for highs in the wrong direction.

Reach for God knowing that He has reopened the way to paradise. Our sin separates us from God, but God has acted in Jesus Christ to eliminate our sin and give us entry into life with Him, which is what the garden represents. God loves you and sent His Son to rescue you from death. Listen to the invitation to trust in the gospel from Jesus' own words.

“I am the resurrection and the life. Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live, and everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (Jn 11:25-26)

This is indeed the will of my Father, that all who see the Son and believe in him may have eternal life; and I will raise them up on the last day.” (Jn 6:40)

If you'd like not to end up like some people, busying themselves with all the wrong reaches, amusing themselves to death, I pray you will accept the call of God within you to trust in Christ Jesus for the saving of your lost and longing soul.

Merciful and Loving God, our souls will not rest until they learn to rest in Thee. Give us grace to hear You call and courage to come to Your embrace through faith in Christ Jesus. Amen

Crosseyed and Painless by Talking Heads

Talking Heads were a part of the New York punk scene in the late 1970's, but by the beginning of the 1980's their tendency toward art and the avante garde took precedence. The band experimented with sounds and loops of tracked grooves. Their fourth album, Remain In Light (1980), is considered to be their magnum opus, their best work. It's not everyone's cup of tea, especially for punks, but it's just interesting enough to grab my attention. After a while the looped tracks and rhythm become an aural experience. 

The lyrics are secondary to sound. Talking Heads producer for Remain in Light, Brian Eno, certainly felt that way. The band recorded tracks of music and rhythms first, with no preconceptions as to what the lyrics might say. Lyrics came only after the tracks had been recorded and ordered in some kind of song form. At that point David Byrne took to writing lyrics as he listened to the recordings.

The other day during a conversation about facts and how they can be used to manipulate or distort the actual truth, I immediately thought of the song Crosseyed and Painless.  According to an article on Wikkipedia...

The lyrics discuss a paranoid and alienated man who feels he is stressed by his urban surroundings. These lyrics are of common theme for Talking Heads and categorize lead singer David Byrne's writing style. The "rhythmical rant" in "Crosseyed and Painless"—"Facts are simple and facts are straight. Facts are lazy and facts are late."—is influenced by old school rap, specifically Kurtis Blow's "The Breaks" given to Byrne by Talking Heads drummer Chris Frantz.

Others have suggested the song is about being under the influence of opiates like heroin. Not likely. On songmeanings.com there are many varied interpretations. One compelling argument I quote below.

I think this is an argument about the nature of human beings. Humans tend to shape things in order to fill holes. They label, the examine, they change. We have removed ourselves from evolution in this way.

Byrne, I think, is arguing that our need and obsession with doing this is actually doing the opposite. Its making us lose ourselves, and making our understanding less complete. The whole album I think is about this to a degree.

Ironically, the fact is that Byrne was matching lyrics to accompany sound. He had to change the way he sang in order to create a vocal track the fit well as an accompaniment to the grooved tracks. His lyrics are less about meaning  and more about how the words delivered sound with the track. In essence the words are simply another instrument layered upon all the others.

Having said that, Byrne did use words which are like snapshots of ideas. John Lennon did this in I Am The Walrus. Bob Dylan did it in Subterranean Homesick Blues. So when analyzing lyrics, we a have to realize we are looking at an abstract piece of art. Abstract draws out of us what we see. While we try to make sense of the senseless, we label, categorize and fill in the holes. Our interpretation is our attempt to give meaning to the meaningless.

Give this song a listen. Don't read the lyrics, yet. Just let the sounds do their thing.
http://youtu.be/cY3tHQJegOM

Crosseyed and Painless 

Songwriters: BYRNE, DAVID/FRANTZ, CHRISTOPHER/WEYMOUTH, TINA/HARRISON, JERRY/ENO, BRIAN PETER GEORGE

Lost my shape-Trying to act casual!
Can't stop-I might end up in the hospital
I'm changing my shape-I feel like an accident
They're back!-To explain their experience

Isn't it weird/Looks too obscure to me
Wasting away/And that was their policy

I'm ready to leave-I push the fact in front of me
Facts lost-Facts are never what they seem to be
Nothing there!-No information left of any kind
Lifting my head-Looking for danger signs

There was a line/There was a formula
Sharp as a knife/Facts cut a hole in us
There was a line/There was a formula
Sharp as a knife/Facts cut a hole in us

I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...
I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...
I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...

The feeling returns/Whenever we close our eyes
Lifting my head/looking around inside

The island of doubt-It's like the taste of medicine
Working by hindsight-Got the message from the oxygen
Making a list-Find the cost of opportunity
Doing it right-Facts are useless in emergencies

The feeling returns/Whenever we close our eyes
Lifting my head/Looking around inside.

Facts are simple and facts are straight
Facts are lazy and facts are late
Facts all come with points of view
Facts don't do what I want them to
Facts just twist the truth around
Facts are living turned inside out
Facts are getting the best of them
Facts are nothing on the face of things
Facts don't stain the furniture
Facts go out and slam the door
Facts are written all over your face
Facts continue to change their shape

I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...
I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...
I'm still waiting...I'm still waiting...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'll make an attempt to reflect upon the lyrics, even though I know Byrne isn't saying anything. The ambivalence toward facts might be how I feel listening to the talking heads on the news channels. they fill the airways with thought, opinion and the latest trends and studies. I have grown completely disinterested in news agencies. It is my opinion that they spin stories for one of two objectives. The first is to drive sales of the advertisers on the station. The second is to shape public opinion around a political ideal driven by the moneybags behind the news station. 

Have you noticed how often we are approached with "a recent study shows...?" They give us facts that somebody wants to use to shape our opinion in accordance with the marketing objectives of either consumer products or political ideals. Who's behind the studies? Who funded the studies? Who's behind giving us the so-called facts?

My favorite revision to the world as we know it is the formerly known as planet Pluto. Pluto was taught to be one of the nine planets of our solar system. But now scientists have reclassified Pluto as an ice orb, not the same as a planet. They simply didn't have enough data to know what Pluto actually is. Now they have more facts and realize that Pluto does not hold the same characteristics as what is classified as a planet. Sorry, Pluto.

The reclassification of Pluto makes a point about facts. We don't know them all. And of the facts that we think we know, these are only there to help us create theories and hypotheses. They are only representations of the actual reality. Facts are used to create interpretations about the observable data in the universe. Whenever we think we have it all figured out, new data or differing interpretations come along. What I find interesting in the post-modern world is how revisionists seem to make a living contradicting everything we thought we knew. As a result new interpretation emerge. 

We live life according to how we interpret. The story we tell ourselves affects how we live. Not simply so. We have behaviors that are contrary to what we say we believe. A perfect example is our health habits. We have all the facts we need to know that overeating, eating junk and not exercising leads to bad health potentially an early grave. Some might argue, that these have no bearing. Ultimately it is genetics that decide. But in general, the facts point to healthy choices leading to heath. Most of us are not choosing health. It takes too much time. We know the facts, but there's something else, some other story driving us.

The businessman tells himself, "I know I should, but I have too much work to do. I don't have time. Work is more important." The mother says, "My family comes first. I don't have the energy after attending to the children all day." The preacher says, "I am in the business of saving souls, I can't afford the time to workout." "It's too inconvenient to eat right with all the lunch meetings and pitch-ins. I wouldn't want to make others fell uncomfortable by not eating what everyone else is eating. it wouldn't be polite."

You see what I mean? The story that is really driving our decisions is a belief that there is something more important that our health. I might just say, "I work hard and I deserve to relax and enjoy myself." Another might say, "I'm going to die anyway, I might as well enjoy myself while I can." These ideas or attitudes speak louder than the facts. The fact is I'm lazy and self-indulgent. 

How do we change our shapes? More to the point how do we change our behaviors that shape our lives. Some would argue you must change your head, your way of thinking. The modern view was that with the right information guiding us, we will live accordingly into a better future. It didn't work out that way. The post-modern model of education draws more on experience and relationships. If we experience the behavior we are wanting to adopt routinely, our minds and our attitudes will change.

When deciding how you will live your life, you have to sift through all the facts being presented to you, far much more than we can possibly digest, and create our own relationship with them. Facts are lazy. They don't do anything. It's just data. We are the ones who develop a relationship with facts or data to create an interpretation, a picture in our mind that we live with.

The overarching picture that drives our lives is what we call a worldview. Religion, philosophy and political idealism, all present an interpretation of life on earth or the best life. I am a Christian. The big picture that drives me is hope in the creator to bring a world of justice, peace, health and joyful living. I labor to this end by preaching hope in the goodness of God and the ability of the creator to do as He has promised.

The facts are that all human civilizations from the very beginning of history have created interpretations of life. In an pluralistic society we each have to sift through the varied interpretation to see which one fits us. This seems reasonable. But what if there is such a thing as truth. All facts point to a reality that cannot be fully described, codified, categorized or even controlled. All facts do is paint an approximation of the actual reality. What if the truth is what God has chosen to reveal about Himself in the holy scriptures of the church of Jesus Christ? What if Jesus is the truth, just as he is recorded to have said?

I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. (Jn 14:6)

If Jesus is the truth, then He is real. He is a reality that defies being completely known by facts, just as you are beyond being completely known by what others say about you...or even what you say about yourself. We are always discovering.

I invite you to discover more fully the truth, Jesus Christ. For to know Him is to know God and to know God is to know life that has no end.

Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent. (Jn 17:3)

Have fun exploring and discovering. I recommend going to an ALPHA course at a local church as a start. www.alphausa.org

He (God) is the Maker of heaven and earth,
the sea, and everything in them— (Psa 46:6a)

God so loved the world that he gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him will not perish, but have everlasting life. (Jn 3:16)

Sin is lurking at the door; its wants to own you, but you must master it.” (Gen 4:7b)

For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Rom 6:23)

So if anyone is in Christ, there is a new creation: everything old has passed away; see, everything has become new! (2Co 5:17)

Then the righteous will shine like the sun in the kingdom of their Father. Let anyone with ears listen! (Mat 13:43)

And those are just the facts. You have to put them together into a worldview.

Lord, give us ears to listen and minds to comprehend the truth that we might know enough of You to be saved. Amen

Merry Go Round by The Replacements

I got in on The Replacements at the very end of their career. I had heard about them, but hadn't really taken time to listen to them. I saw the album, All Shook Down in the cut outs at the record store and decided to give them a chance. I was not disappointed. 

These were the days before the internet. It was in the early 1990's when I bought their LP. This was before Wikipedia provided instant information on bands and musicians. This was before Youtube. I couldn't go listen to a few The Replacements songs to check them out. I couldn't go to Spotify or Pandora or Last FM. I had to either find a fan of the band and go to their place and give them a listen, or borrow their albums or cassettes. 

If I had been able to, I might have gotten into this band much earlier. The Replacements, under the leadership of songwriter, lead vocalist, and guitarist, Paul Westerberg, are considered the godfathers of alternative rock. I've never really been sure if I understood what the genre actually is. Alternative rock almost seems to be the umbrella under which any form of rock fits, when it doesn't fit. Misfit Rock might be another way to talk about alternative rock. What's ironic is that alternative rock has become mainstream, so it no longer is misfit or alternative. Go figure.

The Replacements were a Minneapolis based band who started out very punk rock oriented.They were notorious for performing drunk and or stoned. This was a garage band that built a strong Midwestern following and eventually signed with a major label. Even though rock historians give The Replacements a vaulted place as being major league influential, they never really achieved commercial success.

The album All Shook Down had more success than most of the band's releases. Interestingly the album was recorded using hired studio musicians under the direction of Paul Westerberg. The band broke up not long afterwards. Even still, the album was nominated by the Grammy Awards as the best alternative music album.

Merry Go Round was an instant personal favorite for me. I love the song. It hit #1 on the  Modern Rock Tracks charts for four consecutive weeks. When I think of The Replacements, Merry Go Round is the song I think of. 

Give it a look see.  http://youtu.be/uac_KQn9Q-M

Merry Go Round

Songwriter: Paul Westerberg

A "hush" was the first word you were taught
And they watched you wear
The clothes they claimed that they bought
They brought you down
To watch the merry-go around

In fall, you knew how much it cost
A trouble doll around your neck when you lost
You wouldn't make a sound
But I could hear your little heart pound
And I watched your feet slip off the ground

Merry go round in dreams
Writes 'em down, it seems
When she sleeps, she's free
Merry go round in dreams

You wake to another day and find
The wind's blow'in out of key with your sky
Only you can see
And the rain dancin' in the night
Everybody stands around in daylight

Merry go round in dreams
Writes 'em down, it seems
When she sleeps, she's free
Merry go round in dreams

And everybody thinks she's sick
She's got two worlds she can pick
And she's sad

Hush is the only word you know
And I stopped listening long ago
They ignored me with a smile
You as a child
But the trouble doll hears your heart pound
And your feet say goodbye to the ground

Merry go round in dreams
Writes 'em down. it seems
When she sleeps, she's free
Merry go round in dreams

Merry go round in dreams
Merry go round in me
Merry go round
Round and round in me

Merry go round
Round and round in me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The lyrics are somewhat sad and just vague enough that you can read all kinds of stuff into them. That's what's great about art. The lyrics serve up images and pieces which we try to put together into a coherent portrait. Our interpretation is actually a mirror image of ourselves.

Some think of this song as a tribute to the childhood of Paul Westerberg and his sister Mary. They grew up with little means and when other kids were getting new clothes each fall, they were wearing hand me downs and stuff from Goodwill or garage sales. 

The first line takes us right into a child's life at home. "A 'hush' was the first word you were taught." That says a lot about the kind of parents this kid had. They raised their kids under the belief that children are meant to be seen, but not heard. Hushing them is a gag order. I'll assume the singer feels the pain of not being invited to share his thoughts. 

The parents who shush you also lie to you, when they claim they bought you new clothes, when they are truly hand me downs given to them from others. Perhaps they didn't have the means and their pride would not allow them to be honest with their little ones. A childhood remembrance is of trips to the park to watch a merry go round, to ride upon it and enjoy your feet flying off the ground.

"They brought you down" may serve as a double entendre. It means her parents took the little girl down to the park to watch the merry go round, but it also means the parents brought her down emotionally. The merry go round is a metaphor, for those troubling thoughts that we keep going over in our head and hearts. Unresolved pain, anger, sadness, and fears can keep us going round and round in circles, spinning to their twisted melodies inside us.

Trouble Dolls (aka worry dolls) from Guatemala

The little girl was aware enough of her parents' posing, and lying to her, that she told her troubles to a trouble doll. The tradition of the trouble doll goes back to the Mayan people of Guatemala. A small fabric doll is fashioned and given to their children. They can whisper their worries and troubles to the doll and place the doll under their pillow. In the morning the doll has taken their worries away. 

Westerberg uses the trouble doll image to speak about his compassionate concern for the little girl and her internal pain that she has carried for years. She wears her childhood pain into her adulthood like a doll around her neck hanging in a pouch. She has grown silent and isolated, but the singer knows she hurts. He can "hear her little heart pound."

The picture of depression, a popular form of spiritual torment and mental illness in our modern world, is a haunting one. The girl is only free of it when she sleeps. And even in her dreams sometimes she thinks of things she must write down, perhaps in a diary. Do these things help her cope, or do they continue her torment?

I can't help but think of the adult girl with her feet off the ground as another double meaning. As we spin on a merry go round our feet fly outward off the ground with the centrifugal force. But what if Westerberg is singing about a girl who hanged herself in despair? Hanging from her noose, her feet are off the ground and her body is spinning ever so slowly. (I've seen too many murder mysteries!)

It's not too far fetched when you consider the pain this girl carries. She feels alienated from her surroundings. The wind is out of key with her sky. She feel alienated from others. They stand in daylight, while she feels like she is under the dark clouds of a rainy night.  Everybody knows there's something wrong with her. She has to choose, whether she will continue to live in this world with the depression and pain she faces daily, the merry go round of emotions and troubling thoughts, or the world of eternal sleep. If sleep is the only time she is free, perhaps eternal sleep looks most inviting.

The singer admits he's not like her. She continues to mourn silently obeying old voices that tell her to "hush." He's moved on and stopped listening to gag orders. Perhaps something happened to her that required secrecy. Three to four women out of every ten are sexually molested before the age of 18. Secrecy is what keeps the child under the power of their perpetrator. 

One last thought on the image of feet going off the ground. Westerberg was familiar with drug abuse. He could be implying the feeling of getting high from drugs. That euphoric sensation, that comes from pill popping and grass toking, or shooting up, relieves the tortured soul for a brief period. If she can deaden her senses she can escape from this painful place, this accursed ground, and fly away in the ether. Like the merry go round, she isn't going anywhere, but in circles. It's only part of an addictive cycle spinning round and round.

What does my faith have to say about the merry go round? I've been there. I've lived with severe depression. I know the plague of troubling thoughts, from which there seems no escape. I did consider suicide at one time. And I was slowly trying to kill myself with drugs and alcohol. I was one of the fortunate ones who survived. I found a way out through my faith in God to heal me.

Jesus met a man tortured by demons. He lived in the tombs among the dead. He cut himself with stones. He was not able to be bound. He broke the chains and rain naked and screeching in the night. (Mk 5:1-5) This man met Jesus and screamed at him.

When he saw Jesus from a distance, he ran and fell on his knees in front of him. He shouted at the top of his voice, “What do you want with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? In God’s name don’t torture me!” For Jesus had said to him, “Come out of this man, you impure spirit!”

Then Jesus asked him, “What is your name?”

 “My name is Legion,” he replied, “for we are many.” And he begged Jesus again and again not to send them out of the area. (Mk 5:6-10)

Jesus cast the demons out of the man and they possessed a herd of pigs, which promptly ran into the lake and drowned. The formerly possessed man was now sane, in his right mind, fully clothed and sitting at the feet of Jesus.

This story resonates with me. I've felt crazy like the man described in the story. I've felt that out of control. Jesus helped me name my demons, just as he did them man in the story. Jesus told me to claim His power, just as he exerted his power to exorcise the man's demons. And Jesus tamed my visceral rage, just as he tamed the man. I like thinking of myself, like that man, fully clothed in Christ, in my right mind, which is the mind of Christ, and sitting at the feet of Jesus. In that place I feel such gratitude. In that place I feel free.

Lord, You are the Son of the Most High God. You are God on earth. You are God in me. Continue to set us free from the merry go round of troubles and worries and persistent pains, that we might get off the merry go round and choose the abundant life. In Your name, Jesus. Amen.